Just Let Me Go...
By Yvette

He remembered seeing her lying on the red silk cloth .. so weak, so feeble .. a fallen angel that was dying too slowly. " We are losing her!", Deuteronomy yelled, trying everything he could do by the use of his powers. But he was not a healer .. there was little he could do but ease her pain.

He remembered hearing the words that meant the end of his life.... the words that meant death to his spirit and soul... "She is gone .. Heaviside take care of her......" Deuteronomy whispered, his sobs so soft that they made the words barely audible to the others.

He remembered the others..torn with grief and anger, they had loved her so much. He had seen it at that moment, but who could not love Demeter? She was the quiet star of the tribe, the watchful one, the protecting, one of the best guardians of the kittens.

[Why did she have to do it? Why?], the tears fell freely from his eyes. Of course he already knew why. Demeter had died as she had lived .. glorious. There would never be another like her.

Earlier that day

"We cannot afford to keep fighting. We have to take him down, fast and hard.", Munkustrap pointed towards the raging Macavity. He had come with what seemed like all of his forces ..ready to slay. to claim .. her.

"Munkus .. we are going to be slaughtered. You have to let me reason with him! I know I can get through to him!! Demeter had argued for the sake of the two kittens faught with them. " Dem, this...monster is beyond reasoning, we can only fight him." he had answered. If only he could have said more if only ..

Without warning she worked her way around the shield of strays towards the raging storm that was the Hidden Paw. Not worried for herself....just worried about what might happen...what *would* happen to them all, but she was going to stop it. Right here and now. She was the only one he could ever have reasoned with, the one who could understand him.... usually.

"Demeter! By Dawn's light! NO!!", Munkustrap had hollered after her, as a stray and then another engaged him in a fierce fight ...but it was too late. She reached Macavity somehow and looked at the fury in his face, she could see his pain...his anger...and the enormous danger. "Mack!" she yelled in his face "You have to stop this! The others are coming. You will only hurt yourself! PLEASE! You cannot win!"

The expression in his eyes chilled her soul "Demeter .. I am *not* in the mood to debate this with you at present. I wan you .. come with me or leave completely before I am forced to make you leave."

"You think I am going to leave when you all are being stupid like this! I do not think so!"

"Then I have no choice. Goodbye, Demeter. If I cannot love you .. then no one will " and with that he raised his claws in a commanding pose, as he normally did when .. he struck. Demeter gasped as he struck .. his sharp claws biting in her flesh . her chest . her paws .. her head .. her neck .. a torrent of blood sprayed him .. coming from a great slash at her neck. Demeter slumped onto the ground, her head hitting the pavement with a sickening crack. Her eyes, wide with disbelief and shock, never left him.

Macavity finally had his vengeance.

"NO .. " , Munkustrap could only scream horrified as the hidden paw vanished in the night .. together with all of his followers.

"By the .. ", Jellylorum looked away, shielding the kittens from the grisly sight.

Munkustrap had rushed to her side, to check on her. " She's alive...we have to get her back to the junkyard...NOW!!!" They retreated as fast as they could, Demeter's vital signs were getting worse and worse... Too late to bring her to a hospital .. if they could only ..

Only a few minutes later...

Deuteronomy slowly crept outside the old car to the empty clearing. The place where Munkustrap sat, his face was pale and weathered. The old cat bore the look of a tom who had just walked into hell.

"Munkustrap, she would like to see you...", he informed the grieving tom.

"Thanks" , he whispered and went into the car wreck.

He crept over to the inside where she was lying on. Her face, normally so cheerful and full of life, was worn...her features, normally so alive as well , were dead. Her eyes...her beautiful eyes were not as bright as normal..but open and full of emotion.

"Dem ..can you hear me?" he choked.

She looked at him the best she could and her eyes told him yes..

"I want you to know that I love you .. With all my heart." It was the only thing that he could say, the only thing that Munkustrap knew would matter. She opened her mouth...trying to respond... "....I....lov..", she closed her eyes, the tears stinging, the frustration drove her mad...

"I know, love. I know." He tried to hold the tears back, but failed.

He tried to push the thought that this was the last time he would talk to her out of his head..but he could not. He just held her paw, the tears falling freely and talked to her the entire time. His head telling him what his heart continued to deny. He spoke of the boyzenberry pie incident with Rumpelteazer, and of their first date...when he had saved her from Macavity's clutches. He promised her that they would have another date when she got better.

There was a slight sound. "Can I come in Munkus?" Misto's voice was soft and dusty .. a thousand years older. "Sure Misto .. we are just chatting", he faked a smile.

"I was thinking that I could link the two of your minds, so you could actually 'talk' to each other. If that is okay with you."

"Do it.", Munkustrap stated simply.

Mistoffelees linked their minds so they could talk, then left quickly. It did not take long before Munkustrap spoke first. *Demeter? Can you hear me?"

*I can hear you Munky .. " Even her mental voice sounded weak...

*I want you to know that everything is going to be all right .. Dem.."

*Munkustrap .. you never were a good liar. I want you to promise me something*

*Anything .. anything ..*

*When I die, do not let me weigh you down*

*Demeter. .you are not going to .. *

*Munky, please..*

*I can't Demeter. I just can't .. I cannot do it*

*I love you Munkustrap. Please, for your own sake...I chose my fate and I knew the risks. I am going to be fine* And as soon as she said that she shuddered and choked suddenly.

That night.....

Deuteronomy had once again manage to stabalize Demeter with the use of his heaven-powers. Munkustrap sat at her side, staring at her intently, looking for any changes in her condition. He reached out and stroked her clammy forehead...and looked at her. He realized that she was not going to live...it was to late for her survival. He knew that the only way for her to go peacefully was for him to let her go. But it would not be as simple as just saying that to himself .. he had to tell her that he had understood, her motives for reaching out to Macavity. He had to tell her that he would not mourn her forever. That he would get on with his life. Or at least try ..

"Demeter .. I do not know if I can or not, but I wil try to get on with my life."

He could almost instinctevly hear her say, " You have to promise."

" I promise. " He whispered, bending over he barely brushed his lips against her forehead, in the only kiss that he could ever give her without choking up. With that he walked out of the wreck and up to her perch, where he could begin his mourning. Two minutes later, Demeter stopped breathing. And he heard the call .. the call that ended his life ..

The next day.....

The gray skies poured rain down onto the junkyard grounds as they each mourned in privacy. Jellylorum had taken the kittens away, to teach them that they would never see Demeter again, Tugger sulked in silence and Misto was with Victoria .. in a far corner .. He sat on her favorite perch, on the roof of the Russel Hotel, overlooking the Junkyard and was sifting through his thoughts of her .. He was torn...after seeing how Deuteronomy had reacted to her death as well as the rest of the tribe, he knew that he would never be able to let her go.

He tried to take his mind off that topic, so he concentrated to remember He did not realize just how strong his love for her that the thoughts .. the memories came so sharp to his mind. Almost as if he was reliving them firsthand again. [She looked so alive, so happy..] He thought looking at the image his own mind created of her. He could not let her go...he just could not. He knew he had promised her, but he felt so dead...so alone. He sat and remembered the times that him and Demeter would sit on the roof and talk for hours. Who would he talk to? Who would listen to him? The roof was the place where he first fell in love with her. It was their spot. Their spot to observe the world, without being part of it. He would probably never even go out onto the roof again.

He looked at the small crystal in his hand .. the only possession that had meant anything to her .. The message crystal, the small magical stone that Mistoffelees had once given her .. Without thinking he spoke the word to activate it .. and was hurt by the small image of Demeter it created.

"Dear Munky, I know that you are pretty upset with me for the things that I ha've done wrong . And I want you to know that I do not blame you, no matter what I said back there. I never did really blame you, and I never will. You are the best thing that ever happened to me and for that I thank you. No matter how long I might still live, I know that they will be good years. Especially when you are with me. And if I ever might die then I want you to get on with your life, and put it, whatever would happen behind you. I also want you to realize that I will always be here for you, no matter what.

Heaviside and Darkside won't stop me from being with you. For as long as you remember me, then I am with you .. I love you, Munky .. always. .. forever." The image fizzled away.

He blinked the tears out of his eyes as he remembered that fight they had gotten into way back when, it was their first true fight. And it had been about nothing. But in a way, this message both stung him and healed him. . Reassuring him that everything was going to be okay. That everything had to be okay. That Demeter was with him no matter what...that she loved him and would always be there for him, through heaven and hell.

"Farewell Demeter .. You died as you have lived .. with honor. In this world .. there were never again be anyone like you."

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